Posted: December 05, 2018
By MJ (Dana Parisi)
Shocker! The guy in your office who randomly gets naked & covers himself in maple syrup to turn himself on is a creep! 52 year old Robery Somley is a landscaper in Monroe, Connecticut. He was working with a female coworker at a client’s home & he thought it was time for a break. She went inside & found him naked, watching porn, covered in maple syrup. She was actually turned on & asked if she could join him- obviously, because who wouldn’t? According to the police report (because why wouldn’t this story end with one of those?), they did some foreplay stuff involving the syrup & even brought some blueberry jelly into the mix (Side note: who buys blueberry jelly?). The woman found out later that Robert had taken a video of the entire thing with his phone & even though she was cool with the syrup & jelly thing, she was NOT okay being recorded with out her permission. The cops got a search warrant & went through his phone & found the videos & arrested him for voyeurism. —
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